Just as when Peter first penned God’s instructions to wives in 1 Pet 3:1-6 ,
from that day until this:
wifely submission remains a powerful, redemptive, God-given response of a wife who is married to a disobedient husband!
Sarah was God’s chosen role model and God must have His reasons for His choice 
Soooo, in order to better understand and obey God’s instructions to me, I spent quite a bit of time reading, studying, meditating upon, and praying about just how Sarah was:
1 Pet 3:5-6 They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah , who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.Sarah is not a shrinking violet, not a doormat, definitely has a voice in the relationship.
Sarah is assertive and has quite a bit of power in her marriage relationship with Abraham! I learned from Sarah’s role model that godly submission can have an assertive face and is not always going to be pleasing to the husband. Look at this:
Gen 21:10-12 So she said to Abraham, “Cast out this slave woman with her son; … And the thing was very displeasing to Abraham… But God said to Abraham, “Be not displeased… whatever Sarah says to you, do as she tells you,
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Recovering my Inheritance: How much authority did Sarah have?
To help women to be FREE and to walk in their GOD GIVEN authority and dominion, go deeper into the WORD. Do not cast doubt what is GOD BREATHED, alive and active, sharper than any double edged sword!
Look at Sarah here:
Gen 21:9-12
Exactly how much more authoritative can one get?
All at once she speaks with authority into Abraham’s life, into history, and right into the Word of God in the new covenant:
Gal 4:29-31
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Seems to me that Gen 12-15 is “like” the pre-Christian days. God is calling Abram out (in Gen 12) but there is not yet a “covenant”.
In Gen 15 God makes a covenant. That is “like” becoming a Christian.
Gen 17 is the covenant of circumcision. That is “like” a deeper work of God, resulting in deeper intimacy. And their names are changed.
If you read through the account of their life and times carefully, you will see that God’s presence and voice is far more evident following the circumcision covenant in Gen 17.
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I heard a sermon about Sarai which mentioned that the very name Sarai MEANS “contentious”! 
…while Sarah means “princess”. 
Which leads me to identify even MORE with that transition Sarai made to Sarah!
(Here is a link to a similar teaching: Ray Stedman: The Circumcised Life )
To me, this discovery was another thread in the very beautiful, harmonious,
(and very personal and intimate) tapestry of God’s Word!
When I misunderstood submission as a state of wifely powerlessness, I obeyed but I was bitter and resentful- (contentious???) When I came to understand my status in Christ, my dominion, my place as co-heir, queen, God’s princess beside my husband NOT beneath him… my spirit quieted within me.
My submission to my husband is-to this day- a powerful missional response. Here is link which describes the 1st century historical context of 1 Peter- Click Here.
I have compiled material on Sara into a series :
[...] I have seen the role model of Sarah (1 Pet 3) used to suggest that a wife is POWERLESS, a wife has NO say over her destiny- “After all, Sarah submitted to be given in bigamous marriage to a pagan king” For more on Sarah’s role model of submission to a disobedient husband, I refer you to this page: As Sarah obeyed Abraham [...]
[...] Sarai made to Sarah! (Here is a link to the post about Sarai- contentious and a whole page on “as Sara obeyed Abraham”) To me, this discovery about Sarai(contentious)–> Sarah (ruler) was another thread in the [...]
[...] is a wonderful faith building, redemptive, and human account. (See “as Sara obeyed Abraham”) Sarah is assertive and has quite a bit of power in her marriage relationship with Abraham! I [...]
“wives should be submissive to there husbands”
Submission is not demanded by dictatorship it is earned.
http://www.johnpreiss.wordpress.com
Ray Stedman has written some good stuff Charis [sounds like you and I are on a similar journey]
and I believe his widow wrote with him, and she still writes.
the N.T. teaches voluntary, [not forced] submission from each believer to another “out of reverence for Christ” [Eph. 5:21]
if both husband and wife practice this from the Spirit within both, out of reverence to Him, in the other, this is the way ahead.
Submission does not have to mean agreement, of course.
Right attitude and respect can be maintained even through disagreement.
The word “submission” means to yeild, to give in, to order yourself under the one who is in authority over you. Yes, husbands are to submit to the Lord, and wives to their own husbands.
Yes, it must be willing, but that doesn’t mean it is not obligatory. We get our own wills on board with the will of another. We give in, give up, yield, quit fighting, quit resisting, make peace. We submit to our husbands. Husbands submit to Christ.
We all submit to God because He is our Lord. In the marriage, a wife submits to her husband because he is her lord in the marriage. He rules, and she follows.
This is the pattern that Abraham and Sarah followed, though imperfectly at times. Sarah left Ur with him. She lived in tents with him. She did him kindness on occasion by telling others that she was his sister. She agreed to that before the left Ur.
She definitely took the submissive role. One time God told Abraham to do what his wife said, since she was right. Otherwise, he would have had his way. God intervened.
Hi webfoot,
Thank you for your comment. You reminded me that I have some updated material which will fit nicely on this page. Based on the understanding of the passage which you expressed I think you might find the following articles especially enlightening (as well as more in keeping with your own “Sara” style- let’s face it, Webfoot, you are not one to mince words! You remind me of another powerful “daughter of Sara”- namely the Jewish Dr. Laura
)
The Egalitarian Marriage of a True Patriarch by David R. Leigh
On the use of submission in 1 Peter by David R. Leigh
Regards,
Charis
PS BTW, Tell your friend Craig/HPK at CCC I am most grateful for his calling my attention to the resources at CBE. Very enlightening!