If one translates the technical jargon in this article on abuse into biblical language, it sounds very much like a real life description of “your desire shall be for your husband and he shall rule over you”.
As a fundamentalist Christian woman in recovery from a fatal marriage killing MIS-understanding of biblical submission, I identify very [...]
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Posted in abuse, authority/power, control, marriage, roles, submission, tagged Eph 5, kephale, Ephesians 5, "for the husband is the head of the wife", Eph 5:24 on July 10, 2008 | No Comments »
“Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ,
so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.”
Eph 5:24
The word there translated “subject to” means “arrange under” and would more accurately be rendered “support”. “Support” for Christlikeness, never for carnality (or she is failing to be meet help)!!!
And what is a husband “dying to [...]
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Disrespectful Judgments I have heard
“You are being CONTROLLING!”
Exactly how controlling is a DESPOT?
People wag their finger: the pastor, the friend, the recovery-speaker, the theologians, preachers, commentaries….
GOD is not frowning.
GOD is smiling
YOU GO GIRL!
Now there’s a good little despot!
see “oikosdespotes”- OYE! WHAT a DESPOT!
“You are being CONTENTIOUS!”
GOD is on the throne and I believe that [...]
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Posted in control, tagged control issues on April 28, 2008 | No Comments »
Sounds very familiar… from a real life example of a complementarian couple
I’m at the “drawing the line in the sand” phase.
Because her husband took authority over her will, she started to lose who she was as a person and instead of growing and maturing as a person and as a Christian she was kept in [...]
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mmmm smell that smoke…. A sweet aroma unto the LORD!
Which has more authority? A “head“? or a “despot“?
“If I wanted your opinion, I’d ask for it!”
“You can’t buy that book, see that friend, go to that counselor!”
“Adam’s big mistake was listening to Eve. I don’t intend to do likewise!”
“The Bible says SUBMIT, your body belongs [...]
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Posted in abuse, accountability, control, marriage, separation, tagged abuse, bitter wives, bitterness, control, healing, manipulation, marriage, recovery, separation on April 10, 2008 | 8 Comments »
Why do wives get so very, very bitter?
Why is it that a wife will finally get so fed up, that she is really fed up?
After a wife cries out to God, pleading with Him to touch her husband for 20 years…
We have taught wives that they are to be quiet and just pray for their [...]
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Posted in Abraham and Sarah, Esther, Word Study (Greek/Hebrew), abuse, authority/power, control, husband, love, submission, tagged abuse, control, Esther, marriage, Steven Tracy, submission on April 9, 2008 | 6 Comments »
I believe that the misuse of submission doctrine is directly linked to the high divorce rate among professing Christians and is a travesty which robs women of human dignity and spiritual authority and effectiveness and robs men of the help MEET God designed and intended. I find very disturbing to see over and over again [...]
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On the “dashboard” of a WordPress blog, one can see “search terms” which people used in order to find the blog. I decided that I needed to add a new page when I saw these search terms within the past one week:
-can a christian wife leave her abusive husband
-christianity sexual submission
-my pastor says [...]
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Posted in abuse, control, marriage, pornography, submission, suffering, tagged Christian marriage, control issues, lust, sexual abuse, sexual sin on February 14, 2008 | 2 Comments »
1Thes 4: 3-6 God wants you to be holy,
so don’t be immoral in matters of sex.
Respect and honor your wife.
Don’t be a slave of your desires
or live like people who don’t know God.
You must not cheat any of the Lord’s followers in matters of sex. (CEV)
From Why do I feel so [...]
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Molly’s questions:
Where does the “submitted wife” go when her husband has an anger problem? What about when he wants to control everything. When she has to ask permission for the simplest things, to ask permission for all outside-the-home activities? What if he tells her to start keeping an hour-by-hour log of everything she did that [...]
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One can OBEY with a very resentful contentious(unsubmissive) attitude
OR one can DIS-OBEY with a sweetly submissive attitude.
I have a rather trivial example from my life with a “control freak” husband. This is the episode/the object lesson where it FINALLY registered to me that I was behaving like a “slave wife” and OBEYING instead of a [...]
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Posted in Word Study (Greek/Hebrew), abuse, anger, conscience, control, tagged 1 Tim 2, anger, bible, bitterness, clamour, Eph 4, malice, rage on November 16, 2007 | No Comments »
In 1 Tim 2:11-15 the word translated “usurp authority over” is “authenteo”
It is unique- occurring only once in the Bible- and implies very forceful behavior carrying the meaning: absolute master; murderous; autocratic.
One can pontificate endlessly about the meaning of the word… but I suspect the behavior Paul is describing is not limited to a window [...]
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So, in the dream I am the slave who is fanning the king.
I was talking to Chris and Lisa, telling them some things that happened over the weekend.
Lisa starts doing a “slave fanning the king” motion.
I get it!
He does his “control freak” routine.
I lose my temper, I’m outta control
I feel guilty
So I cave and ‘fan [...]
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