I am in a season of doing just that and I would appreciate your prayers as well.
One of my conditions for attempting to heal and reconcile the marriage after my husband’s most recent season of adultery is that he remain alcohol free and I came to find out about two weeks ago by the odor on his breath (he forgot his usual dosing up with mouthwash and strong gum) that he has been drinking. When I questioned him, he admitted to drinking for “8 months”.
After a week or so of great pain, confusion, and failure to maintain a strong line on my part. After two weeks of listening to a constant spewing of the same old same old self-justification, denial, and bullying, I have decided that my yes is yes and my no is no and I need to stick with that. So, he is to schedule a meeting with the church group of two couples that attempted to help us following the exposure of his adultery. At this point, he is declaring obstinately that he will continue drinking. If that is what he chooses, I will be filing for divorce.
I have the preliminary paperwork all prepared and plan to file it the day of or as soon as possible after that meeting with the church group. In my state, one fills in grounds. Here are my grounds:
Between about June 2007-Summer 2008 Routine Internet pornography usage graduating to strip club patronage. Between about October-December of 2008, adulterous affair involving repeated rendezvous for sex including at least sexual rendezvous at our ***** home. One of the plaintiff’s conditions for attempting to reconcile and heal the marriage from these betrayals which occurred under the influence of alcohol is that the defendant remain alcohol free and the defendant has chosen to continue using alcohol. The conduct of the Defendant was cruel and inhuman and so endangered the mental well being of the Plaintiff as to render it unsafe or improper for the Plaintiff to cohabit with the Defendant
My adult children, some relatives and friends, and my internet friends know of this site. I have spoken to all of my adult children and they understand my reasons. They are praying.
I have been spending time daily in prayer and worship and I have a great deal of peace and reassurance about my decision. The alcohol has hooks in him and either way: whether he chooses to die to himself and lay it down for my sake or whether he chooses to continue to embrace the “high life”, with or without him I will be living in freedom and walking in victory.