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A Wife’s Submission

Lessons Learned in the Crucible of Marriage

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Daughters of Sarah

April 9, 2010 by Charis

Mimi Haddad’s editorial in this quarter’s “Mutuality” [ Dating Spring 2010 Vol. 17, Issue 1]  reminds me, once again, of how differently little girls are perceived and molded in Jewish circles compared to the Christian circles in which I have traveled.

I remember growing up in a Jewish neighborhood. If I wanted to play with my neighbor friends on Saturdays, I had to join them in Saturday school. It was there that I encountered the strong women of Scripture: Deborah, Miriam, Jael, Esther, Rahab, and Ruth. My Jewish teachers were careful to show that every girl in the room had the capacity for enormous leadership as an ezer, as God’s envoy in this world. It was one of the most empowering experiences I had as a child. Perhaps it was in Saturday School that I discovered my dignity and worth as a female, created like Eve, to bring a special version of rescue to our world. Our task as ezer is not to wait for permission from men to serve. My vocation comes from God, who from the beginning created me as a powerful agent of rescue. -Mimi Haddad in Mutuality

1 Peter 3 issues a call to women to be “daughters of Sarah” meaning Sarah, wife of Abraham whose story can be found in Genesis 11-23.

trumpcard2
HT: Paula Fether

What are daughters of Sarah like?

Is a daughter of Sarah a passive, quiet, obedient wife more like journey describes in “The God Card: Ask Your Husband”? Or is a daughter of Sarah powerful as Haddad describes above?

Perhaps a daughter of Sarah is more like the Jewish wife described here?

I do know a thing or two about Jewish women (including the one to whom I have been happily married for 20 years). And while she is extraordinarily gracious in many situations, you can be absolutely assured that “submission” is entirely absent from her behavioral repertoire. . . . My good, assertive, outspoken, forceful Jewish wife will simply never be fodder for conversion to a creed that expects her to be submissive, graciously or otherwise. There is no submission in our family and not much “servant leadership” either. What we have instead, in a tradition dating back to our matriarchs, is debate, disagreement, dialogue and then more debate. I always thought that approach made our marriage happier, stronger, and certainly more interesting. Now it has the added benefit of making us immune to proselytization.
———-(Steven Lubet, 6 September 1998) [source pg 16-17]

What are daughters of Sarah like?

What was Sarah like?  How did God see her?  In Hebrew Scriptures, a person’s name said something about their identity.  GOD changed her name and deliberately and clearly instructed Abraham that she was no longer to be called Sarai [contentious] but Sarah [ruler].

Genesis 17:15
God also said to Abraham, “As for Sarai your wife, you are no longer to call her Sarai; her name will be Sarah.

A modern Jewish father , Noah, embracing the name and legacy of Sarai for his own newborn daughter:  Sarai ____ What’s in a Name? mentions that

“the name Sarai means ‘my princess’ in biblical hebrew and ‘contentious’ in modern Hebrew”

[Note: I found evidence for the "contentious" meaning in ancient Hebrew as well. Notice how Noah is not ashamed to give his daughter a name which can mean "contentious".  Contending is not such a bad thing!. Sarai was "contentious" until she became Sarah exercising  rightful authority/dominion- see “BE NOT DISPLEASED… whatever Sarah says to you, do as she tells you”]

Noah writes to his daughter:

Sarai we have given you this name and we hope that you too will be a prophetess or leader of both the Jewish people and the world. That you will be a woman of immense beauty, which you’ve already accomplished, and that you will earn your name in the world, whether it is given by G-d or the people of this world, your family or your friends.

Mimi Haddad, who is quoted at the beginning of this blog has a vision for the church which she writes about in the same editorial quoted above:

As evangelicals who hold a high view of Scripture, should we
not also cast similar vision for our daughters today? Rather than
suggesting that their leadership repels males, could we not celebrate our daughters as ezers, as powerful help to their communities, just as organizations and researchers are now discovering? Rather than limiting their access to positions of leadership or requiring their passivity in relationships with males, let’s equip our daughters with the truth about their creational DNA—to provide strong rescue.

What if with every female who comes to faith, with every girl
who enrolls in Vacation Bible School, with every book we write on dating, and with every youth curriculum we publish, we present women

not in terms of their ability to captivate by their physical appearance,

or their passivity so as not to offend men,

but by their calling as ezer—a help likened to God’s rescue.

Last, but not least, my friend, commenter on this blog,  junior high Sunday School teacher, and mother:  Mara is quietly stepping out to fulfill this vision.  See Where Have I Been This Time

May your tribe increase, Mara!

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Posted in 1 Pet, Abraham and Sarah, authority/power, Bible Passages, Biblical Characters | Tagged Daughters of Sarah | 5 Comments

5 Responses

  1. on April 9, 2010 at 8:44 pm Mara

    Teehee, just noticed your last paragraph.
    Aaaw shucks.
    And thanks!
    But, yes. It’s true. I want my sons AND daughters to be strong and to be leaders.
    I want Sarahs and Deborahs and Huldahs and Miriams.
    Our daughters are part of the priesthood of believers. They are called to prophesy and dream dreams and dance through their lives in a praise to God, unashamed and unhindered by the fear of men.
    May God open our minds and spirits further as to how to raise up sons and daughters to accomplish His purpose.


  2. on April 10, 2010 at 4:40 pm shadowspring

    Love it! Excellent post. I want my daughter to read it. =)


  3. on May 7, 2010 at 4:53 pm Jane

    I am doing a Feminist Mother’s Day Series on my blog,

    it’s Not what you may think,

    will keep it up until Monday.

    http://homesewersneedleworkersunion-hsnwu.blogspot.com/2010/05/mothers-day-why-it-is-still-important.html

    Love,

    Jane


  4. on May 9, 2010 at 12:17 pm Jane

    Just to let you know, the second part of series is up,

    I moved it to the top to make it easier to access, as I have Tons of video and issues on my blog….

    the second part of the series has several videos, because I didn’t post yesterday, I had to cram two sections–so it’s a bit long,

    but well worth it if when you have time because I am opening up dialogue on Both sides of the demonizing of mother’s coin, so to speak AND the detriments caused to the entire society as a result of. It is my hope that possibly in addressing many of these issues,

    there will be serious re-thinking on the Importance that Mothers have to society and that devaluing not only Motherhood [that includes the patriarchal-religious using motherhood as nothing more than a mere means of subjugation and imprisonment] but devaluing All caretaking work,

    is Killing children globally, either by war, abandonment and sexual exploitation.

    Hi Hannah,

    I have been working on a Mother’s Day Series, on the Devaluing of Mothers and Why It Hurts All Women, addressing the Misogyny and Betrayals to Mothers in Religious Patriarchy and the Misogyny and Betrayals to Mothers/Women in the Secularist Patriarchy.

    They are media series, with videos, some are long, but the series is in three parts, first on demonizing mothers and homeless teens in America, second on demonizing/or patriarchal control of women–using Motherhood as means to enslave women and It’s root cause of death to both women and children, and the secular anti-mother policies and their root cause of death to both women and children,

    and tomorrow I’ll be doing a part three series on the demonization of motherhood and it’s parallel with destruction of Mother Earth.

    I hope, that this series, will open up dialogue on the many facets of misogyny and devaluing mothers /womb hate in Both patriarchal-capitalist religion AND in secularist atheist pro-pedophile ideologies taking hegemony today.

    http://homesewersneedleworkersunion-hsnwu.blogspot.com/

    Peace,

    Jane


  5. on May 9, 2010 at 12:21 pm Jane

    er, yea sorry about the copy-paste part of the second section there above, trying to cut some time here. BTW, I used videos to relay messages due to the time factor–to write about these issues taking Both poles of religious patriarchy and secular misogyny within leftism, humanism, feminism [the anti-mother kind] takes WAY too long, too much material to cover,

    I chose media to relay various angles, for this reason.

    I will be keeping the Mother’s Day series up for a bout a week, or two, so that readers can come back and read, in part, as some of the video documentaries are 30 minutes long, esp the ones about the homeless/abandoned children in other nations.

    Peace,

    Jane

    Love,

    Jane



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