Cialis? Bah Humbug!

Saw the ad for daily Cialis.
I hope my husband doesn’t get any ideas!

My husband says he has experienced a transformation. He no longer thinks about sex constantly. Last night he compared his constant obsession with sex one year ago with how he is for the past two weeks. He has bragged that he “had quit internet porn” at that time,  but the truth is: he wasn’t any better.  He was worse.   He had just gone completely underground with his  sexual addiction, and secretly graduated to deeper more concrete forms of adultery accompanied by escalating neglect, disrespect, and abuse toward me and the children. One year ago, he was a strip club regular on the verge of commencing a 3 month adulterous affair with a woman 25 years his junior.   Over the past few months, he has demonstrated some much needed consideration for us and today-and for the past two weeks- sex is out of his mind except in totally appropriate situations (my assessment).

Only, he seems to miss it and think something is”wrong” with him. He suggested that maybe he has eaten some poison which “damaged” him. He even deliberately chose to think of erotic images just to “make sure” that the plumbing still worked.

I say he has been delivered from a spirit of lust and if he invites it back, it will come back 7 times worse, and him attributing deliverance to “evil” is at the very least ungrateful (and could be blasphemy).

I hope he embraces the new man.

Did I already talk about the episode only about a month ago? He still spends several nights a week away overnight at the house we are renovating in the city. I can’t do that. When I go work there several days a week, I have to come home the same day and take care of the children in the evening.

I would feel much more secure if I knew that his little “head” is not constantly telling him what to do with him obeying its every whim!

About a month ago, a neighbor there- Peter- offered him Irish coffee in the am. Because one of my conditions is “NO drinking”, he (reluctantly) refused. He walked to the beach in the evening where a busty woman came on to him. He told me he realized something:  if he had been drinking, he would not have resisted.  (I didn’t say it to him, but “DUH”!  Why does he think one of my conditions for not seeking divorce immediately is that the drinking STOPS?  Just to be “mean and controlling”?  NO!  For him, there is a very long term repeated pattern:  Drinking anesthetizes his conscience.)

I hope he embraces the new man!

Tomorrow is our 27th wedding anniversary.  He said its among the top two most significant: 27 and 40.  “How’s that?  I thought 25 and 50 were considered the most significant?”  He said its trinitarian because its 3 cubed, and that 40 is also a deeply significant biblical number.  Interesting perspective…