brokenhearted children —> broken intimacy

Molly’ latest couple posts  got me pondering over why the intimacy is broken in our marriage? Her post reminded me of Donald Miller’s book “Searching for God Knows What” (about the search for intimacy and the only source which will truly satisfy). I posted a clip here.

I identified very much with Molly’s confession that

“I have zero problems with submitting to right authority. Actually, many of our own problems were partially so problematic BECAUSE I am so good at obeying authority (instead of standing up and questioning and/or refusing when appropriate).”

I took a Taylor-Johnson personality test on a couple of occasions. They have a category for “submissive vs dominant” I score 99th percentile under submissive. That is not a good thing. You do not want to know what forms a little girl to believe that she has no voice and no worth. You do not want your daughter to be “submissive” like that! Take my word for it!

I think the intimacy is broken in our marriage because we have believed lies. At some point of deep wounding, Satan whispered his lies and we each came into agreement with them and then went about living life as if they are reality. A little girl and a little boy rejected “femininity” as contemptible. Powerful and influential people who are supposed to protect children caused them to stumble. Deep down inside, the grown woman hates herself. The grown man despises weakness, vulnerability, emotion. Dabbling with porn has reinforced his distorted perception of woman. She is one dimensional, always ready to “serve him”, never sick, never sad, never angry.

So they dance the toxic dance… reinforcing the lies with each other.

until

she comes out of agreement with the lies

and believes,

I mean really believes

deep down inside…

GOOD NEWS!!!
Jesus came

to heal the brokenhearted,
To proclaim liberty to the captives
And recovery of sight to the blind,
To set at liberty those who are oppressed; Luke 4:18